Lita Ford-Living like a runaway

SPV/Steamhammer
2012

The last time Lita Ford did an album was in 2009 with Wicked Wonderland. That album was a huge departure from anything she had previously done however it was overall a total mess with her sounding completely uncomfortable and totally unconvincing. When I heard another album was coming my thoughts were that she would get back to doing more of a rock album probably similar to her late 80's-early 90's albums. Was I right? Not exactly. To be honest I think the last good thing Lita Ford did was "Dancin' on the edge" in 1984. Even though 1988's "Lita" made her a radio darling and earned her some money, it was still a watered down hard rock album that records that followed were even fluffier. The new album seems to have two types of songs-those that tired, worn out material like the title track and those that sound like half hearted attempts at modern hard rock like the lifeless "Relentless" and the almost promising but eventually tedious "Hate". She sounds better on the slower songs because on the medium tracks her voice begins to sound flat like she is struggling to keep going for the whole duration of the song. I think the best song on this album is "Devil in my head". It's a actually a good combination of a semi-modern sound with a strong riff and decent vocals. It's a shame there wasn't more of that kind connection on this album. It's a better attempt at doing something worthwhile than Wicked Wonderland  was, but the results are only slightly improved.

Big Turkey Award

The Big Turkey Award for 2009 goes to Lita Ford. It's not like Lita Ford's "prime" was that special to begin with. However I did have some admiration for her due to the decision to be happy with being a parent and choosing not to try some comeback like every other act who was around in the 80's-early 90's. When I first heard she was going to play at Rocklahoma in 2009 I figured a comeback album was inevitable. I didn't have expectations of it being worthwhile, but she and her husband former Nitro vocalist Jim Gillette managed to put out a recording that's far worse than anything I ever could have dreamed of. The music is light industrial ramblings, but it's all generic at best. The vocals have effects piled on top of them and lack any personality whatsoever. Add to that the lyrics try to be kinky and come across as awkward and unpleasant. So this was an easy decision indeed.

Here is a list of the past Big Turkey award recipients in case you were wondering.
2006-Axl Rose
2007-Rocklahoma
2008-Judas Priest

Lita Ford-Wicked wonderland

JLRG
2009




Almost every hard rock/metal artist from the 80's seems to have made a return of some sorts . When it was first announced that Lita Ford was going to play at this year's Rocklahoma I figured she would be doing an album soon enough. It's been 15 years since since "Black" her last album. Plus the albums she recorded during the 11 years of her solo career were varied in style and quality so I really didn't have any idea of what she would sound like now. My expectations were not that high, because I liked her in the Runaways and enjoyed her first two solo albums, but after that my interest began to fade. About the time she started doing formula hard rock I lost interest. Enough on the past let's take a look at what we get after a long absence. Well, surprisingly enough the majority of this album is light industrial music with subdued vocals from Lita and growling vocals from her hubbie Jim Gillette. Yes, the same Jim Gillette of Nitro fame who was once known for high hair and even higher vocals. Plus most of the songs have some kind of semi-kinky lyrics that didn't really work for me. The sound is heavier than I was expecting, but it's more loud and generic as opposed to having actual heavy hooks. It wasn't exactly annoying, but it was certainly dull and too often the songs began to blend together because they lacked personality. Even in the late 80's and early 90's when Lita was knocking sugary radio friendly rock at least her voice was decent. I always felt she was a good enough vocalist and that at least warranted giving her music a chance. That doesn't happen this time around as there is only a song or two where there are not layers of effects muting any power that may have been in the vocal tracks. I guess she is doing what she wants and that might be important if this was a better album, but unfortunately it's not. I am also not sure who this will appeal to. I doubt her older fans will be impressed and it's not real heavy or memorable enough for fans of that kind of metal. This is an album that will likely soon be forgotten.

Lesser of two evils

It's been a while since I have done one of these, but let's give it go. We have



Cycle Sluts from hell-s/t (1991)



Vs.

Lita Ford-Stilleto (1990)

So we have a joke band (the Cycle Sluts) who made the mistake of trying too hard to be a serious band on some songs. Then we have Lita Ford who was once a good musician when she was with the Runaways and on her first two albums, but by this point she had become a bit of a joke. The years 1990 and 1991 saw a huge outpouring of hard rock and metal releases. There were some good ones, but there were a lot of misfires. These two would be included in that second group. One difference this time around is that the credits for the Cycle Sluts from hell don't actually list who played drums or bass. I know the names of people who played in the band around that time, but since it's not confirmed I can't credit anyone. I will still be judging those instruments anyhow.

Lord Roadkill

Vocals

Venus Penis Crusher, Queen Vixen, She-Fire Of Ice and Honey 1 %'er for the Cycle Sluts take on Lita Ford. Quantity doesn't mean quality as the Cycle Sluts foursome are not exactly bursting with talent. They handle the funnier songs alright, but on many of the other songs they just sound like a bunch of goofy bartenders who somehow lucked into getting signed to a record deal. Oh, wait maybe they sound like that because that's what they really were. Lita's vocals much like most of this album suffer from overproduction. However she hits enough moments to show her talent.

Point to the Lita Ford

Guitarists

Lord Roadkill is up for the Cycle Sluts and he is taking on Lita Ford. Lord Roadkill's playing is fairly average, but he hits a few decent solos. If Lita had shown the playing she did around 83-84 then she would have won this battle easily. Unfortunately it was 1990 and Lita was letting the quest for success overshadow her skill. So her guitar parts are very subdued and limp.

Point to the Cycle Sluts



Rhythm section

Lita Ford's rhythm section on this album was drummer Myron Grombacher and bass player Donnie Nossov taking on some unknown person or persons for the Cycle Sluts. I was close to giving a tie except there was a song or two where I heard the bass for just a few instances on the Cycle Sluts album. That trumps hearing the run of the mill, slicked up sound of Lita Ford's hired guns. So...

Point to Cycle Sluts





Originality/Production

Originality? Uh, I guess these two acts were in the bathroom when that was being handed out. Production? It's like Mike Chapman just smoothed and fluffed up Lita's album in every way he could. The result is a lot of polish and not much else. Glen Robinson handled production duties for the Cycle Sluts album and he did a very standard job. Nothing special, but everything is as should be.

Point to the Cycle Sluts

Who rocks more?

Lita Ford only hit on a few songs here. The ones that were alright were pale versions of where she had been earlier in her solo career. The Cycle Sluts are at their best on their joke songs like "Wish you were a beer" and "Bad Ass Mama". Unfortunately they spent almost half of the album trying to do some semi-serious metal songs that just drag along. Their album would have been much better had it been an EP with just the joke songs. Still they didn't have to do much to best out the lifeless effort of Lita Ford.
Point to the Cycle Sluts

Here are few other items of note on these albums. The Cycle Sluts had a demo out way back in like 1988 and it got some notice. By the time they got signed and released an album, the whole hard rock scene was fading. Lita Ford did a cover of Alice Cooper's "Only women bleed" on this album". While the music was fine, it's a prime example of the fact that it is difficult to cover Alice. He could take even an okay song like "Only Women bleed" and elevate it with his odd and unique vocals. Rounding out Lita's band was keyboardist David Ezrin. Ezrin had previously played with Witch and of course is the son of producer Bob Ezrin.

Okay, the Cycle Sluts take an easy 4-1 victory, but neither album was a joy to listen to. Hoped you liked reading it though. I will try to be more regular about doing these again. The next one will probably be Ozzy's Ozmosis vs. Black Sabbath's Never say die.