Thursday, May 07, 2009

Rocklahoma 2009

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The flowers are blooming and the sun is coming out so that means it is soon time for hasbeen and neverwhere hair bands to head out to Oklahoma. Surely fans with lots of money and not much taste will flock to see them. So once again I asked Bob Vinyl from http://rnrnonsense.toomanyvoices.com/ to come chime in with his thoughts on this years line-up. I took the listing from the Rocklahoma Myspace page.

Thursday:

Anthrax-

Metal Mark-It’s a given they will deliver live. That’s a no brainer. However, I have not been too big on any of their albums since “Sound of white noise” way back in 1992. The biggest question might be will the glam fans who are interested in the bands playing on the other days care about Anthrax?

Saxon-I think these guys will be what I hear Y and T last year. They will come play a good set and the hair metal fans will be like “ I can’t wait for Danger Danger”.

Overkill- They are still good. I can’t understand why they are playing this show instead of jumping on the European festival scene though. I just hope that Bobby Ellsworth doesn’t cough up a lung on stage.

Metal Church- I think there is one original member left and the last album was decent and best. Yet they are still way above the many cream puffs on this show.

Leatherwolf-I have always liked these guys. The last disc was a re-recording of a previous album, but it was still good and their heaviest album to date..

Bob Vinyl-
Why would the first four embarrass themselves by appearing at this hairspray fest? Yeah, I know Saxon released a few lightweight albums in the mid to late 80s that might appeal some Rocklahoma fans, but I'd think Saxon would want to forget that. Anthrax, Overkill and Metal Church just don't make any sense at all. It makes me think less of all of them. Leatherwolf already has a bit of a bad legacy after re-issuing the same album with a new singer, but even they should know better than to participate in this joke.



Friday:
Stryper-
Metal Mark-Uh, the best thing I can say here is at least they won’t be wearing those wretched black and yellow bumblebee looking costumes (at least I hope not).

Bob Vinyl-I always laid off of these guys a bit, because they had the guts to speak out about their beliefs in a scene that wasn't likely to be all that receptive. That being said, I'm not gonna give them a break on getting back together to cash in on this nonsense.

Night Ranger-
Metal Mark-What’s the matter, weren’t Loverboy available?


Bob Vinyl-Hold on, weren't these guys just watered down hard rock 25 years ago? What makes anyone think they'll be better now? Motorin'...yeah, I'd be motorin' right out of there.



Warrant-
Metal Mark-Their third Rocklahoma and they have had a different singer each time. Maybe they should have a contest where someone for the audience will get to be their singer next year.

Bob Vinyl-Warrant is as fabricated as a boy band. Nothing they did was real and nothing they did was any good at all. I don't think I can express in words how completely rotten Warrant was/is. If you like Warrant, you're just stupid.

Danger Danger-
Metal Mark-Stinker, Stinker is more like it.


Bob Vinyl-They could have been called Danger, but they're such a bunch of ninnies that they had to repeat themselves to try to convince everyone. I still don't buy it.

Helix-
Metal Mark-They were bland back in the mid-80s. Does anyone believe that twenty plus years and lots of line-up changes have made them sound better?

Bob Vinyl-Don't you think bands this rotten would rather be forgotten? Apparently not. Too bad, because I'd like to forget.

Hurricane Alice-
Metal Mark-I am confused here because the Rocklahoma Myspace page is listing this under the band’s original name. They became Hericane Alice in the late 80’s and the singer revived the name with three new guys not too long ago. They played a few shows last year, but there is nothing on their Myspace page about them playing Rocklahoma. I guess even the people at the event’s Myspace page didn’t know who these guys are.

Bob Vinyl- If there's a hurricane, do they need extra hairspray?



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Saturday:
Thin Lizzy-
Metal Mark-I like John Sykes, but seriously without Phil Lynott this is just a tribute band.

Bob Vinyl-So was Phil Lynott's death some kinda hoax? I mean that's gotta be more plausible than some other guys from Thin Lizzy getting together and calling it Thin Lizzy without him, right?

KIX-
Metal Mark-These guys never quite made it to the big time in the 80’s. Now when they play these festivals fans act like they are royalty or something. That should tell you something about the quality of the other bands playing this event.

Bob Vinyl-Being from Baltimore, I couldn't even figure out why this guys were popular locally. Seriously, these guys are more embarrassing that the city's crack problem.

KEEL-
Metal Mark-Seriously, these guys were poor back in the day. I don’t how they stayed on a major label as long as they did.

Bob Vinyl-If it's Thin Lizzy without Phil Lynott, maybe the upside is we could have Keel without Ron Keel. No such luck I'm sure. In a genre of ridiculous singers, Ron Keel is one of the worst.


Gypsy Pistoleros-
Metal Mark-If they can keep a steady line-up then they could really be one of the few really promising hard rock bands going today.


Bob vinyl-The ONLY good thing in glam today. The only good band in the lineup after Thursday.


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Sunday:
Twisted Sister-
Metal Mark-Fifty year old drag queens who can barely play their instruments and still they are one of the top bands playing this “event”.

Bob Vinyl-Okay, Dee Snider seems like a cool guy and Twisted Sister was actually pretty good for a bunch of mediocre musicians, but that doesn't mean I want to hear their fleeting moment of success replayed.

Skid Row-
Metal Mark-No Sebastian Bach, so who cares? The youth stopped going wild for these guys a long time ago.

Bob Vinyl-They were one of the best hair metal bands of the late 80s and that still doesn't make them very good. At least without Sebastian Bach, no one will have to hear any of his crappy solo material.


Great White-
Metal Mark-I could make some rude fire comment, but this band was a bad joke long before that ever happened.

Bob Vinyl- Do the tickets come with a fire extinguisher?

Nelson-
Metal Mark-Oh, yeah the guys with the hair. They were very fluffy back in the day so they should fit in fine with this day’s group.

Bob Vinyl-Why do all bad things have to come back? Did anyone who actually liked music and not just pop culture think these guys were any good? And does long hair automatically make it rock music? Doesn't that Yanni guy have long hair? And Kenny G too? Will they be playing Rocklahoma? I mean, they rock as hard as Nelson, don't they?

Bonfire-
Metal Mark-The only band on the main stage that I never heard anything by. They play between Vixen and Nelson so they won’t have to do much to sound good.

Bob Vinyl-Are these guys the Great White after party?

Vixen-
Metal Mark-One original member left. That’s one more than the number of people who gave their last album a positive review.

Bob Vinyl-The novelty of being an all-female band in a scene that celebrated misogyny wore thin about as quickly as the stupidity of the scene as a whole. Isn't this just one original member? I guess the others finally woke up to how rotten the band was in its "prime" let alone now.

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Lineup for the side stages include: MASS, Hallows Eve, Krank, Aska, Bai Bang, Mad Max, Roxanne, Ronny Munroe, Frontrunner, Reckless, Real Steel, Cuttlass, Miles Beyond, Herazz, Revengeance, Letchen Grey, Lickity Split, Biloxi, Aura Surreal, Hollywood Harlot, Electro Nomicon, Halcyon Way, Ritual Habits, The Glitter Boys, Nasty Nasty, Lorraine, Bodragaz, Axeticy, ANJ, Hallucination, Atomic Clock, Widow, Strike The Sun, Altered Ending, Rebel State, Chizel, Zeroking, Fan Halen, T.H.V, Herman Rarebell of the Scorpions and friends, Terry Glaze formally of Pantera, Silent Rage, Warrior, Pair A Dice, Julliet, Wild Street and Vougan.-

Metal Mark-
How did a good band like Hallow’s Eve end up on this train wreck? I remember liking MASS, but that was a long time ago. Did anyone else hear Herman Rarebell’s last album? No, I didn’t think so. Would anyone know who Terry Glaze was if Pantera hadn’t have made it after he left? Doubtful. Earlier report had it listed as Lord Tracy featuring Terry Glaze, but I guess it’s just him now. A lot of the others are from Retrospect’s rag tag fleet. I was always curious about Krank though, I remember hearing a few good words about them back in the day.


In addition to the above named bands, groups who were on the main stage at the previous Rocklahoma festivals are also playing the side stages. Those bands include Beautiful Creatures, LA Guns featuring Tracii Guns, Britney Fox, Bang Tango, Lillian Axe and Faster Pussycat.

My first thought is why are these bands playing the side stage? Aren’t LA Guns much more of an attraction than like a 1/3 of the bands on the main stage? Maybe these bands are stuck in there so that someone actually does come over to the side stages this year. I would be mad if I were Tracii Guns as they had played the main stage for two years now they are stuck on a side stage. Especially since one of those stages fell down last year. Lillian Axe’s last album was pretty good. I think it’s funny that Beautiful Creatures and Bang Tango are on the same bill. Maybe Joe LeSte can come up with another band real quick so he can get another paycheck


There you go. In case you are interested here are the posts on the previous Rocklahoma events.

http://metalmark.blogspot.com/2007/04/rocklahoma-my-view.html


http://metalmark.blogspot.com/2008/03/good-bad-and-our-big-mouths-rocklahoma.html

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27 Comments:

OpenID themetalfiles said...

So I guess neither of you are going, eh? Twisted Sister still delivers live. Their Richmond 2004 still hails as one fo the best shows I have ever seen.

Thin Lizzy is still great live. I do wish they'd call it Sykes/Gorham tribute to Thin Lizzy, but whatevs...they sound great and Sykes sounds a lot like Phil.

Krank? Don't waste your time. They had one good song, Rented Heat, that was on one of the Best of Metal Blade comps. The rest of the album resembled the title...HIDEOUS.

I'd love to see Hallow's Eve (even though they likely suck now) and Warrior.

8:53 AM  
Anonymous JB Martell said...

Ok, I'm a fan of some of those old washed ups, but I have to admit Stryper as a headliner is just damn sad. By the way, they are wearing those damn bumblebee suits. Its called the "Back in Yellow and Black" tour. Vomit on command.

9:20 AM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

Sean-That's what I had heard about Twisted Sister live. I interviewed the bass player from Hallow's Eve a while and he described their last album as being more death metal. I never got around to hearing it though.

JB-They definitely lose even more points for wearing the costumes. To be fair I have heard Robert Sweet play on some other projects in recent years and he is a decent drummer.

11:13 AM  
Anonymous JB Martell said...

He is a great drummer, I agree. But it has to come to a point where these "christian rockers" are selling their souls. I just can't imagine them headling anything.

11:45 AM  
OpenID themetalfiles said...

Robert Sweet is a GREAT drummer. They were my first metal show in 1985.

1:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You guys left out ANVIL!!!! They'll be there and directly after they preform they are going to show the movie on the jumbo tron!! thats pretty cool!!! I live in Pryor Ok where the concert is being held and i can tell you that it isn't just a bunch of hair band fans! ALL metal fans are there and it's just a big ol' 80,000 person a day party! I can't wait to see me some OVERKILL!!!!

6:55 PM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous-We didn't leave out Anvil. They just hadn't yet been announced when we wrote this. With their movie out, they will be helping Rocklahoma maybe more than it will help them.

6:17 AM  
Blogger Cherri said...

We will be streaming live interviews and events at Rocklahoma this year!

You can check out the interviews at http://www.rocklahoma.com and
http://www.doubleexposuremedia.com

We are also periodically streaming our adventures at
http://www.qik.com/DXM starting at midnight June 9th.


Rock on!
Cherriza

9:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

personally, i don't think you should be reviewing menus let alone festivals. i think you are both clueless faggot fucks who wouldn't know a good band if it slapped you both upside your brainless heads. Die soon please.

7:52 PM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous-Personally I think people should use capital letters. Obviously you were worked up into such a frenzy that you just had to type your well thought out arguments as fast as you could. We are very glad that you chose to bless us with views and kind words.
Oh, you may want to sit back and relax before your head pops off. Have a nice day, sunshine.

8:15 PM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous-Oh, so we are gay because we don't love bands who use lots of hair spray, wear
tight pants and talk about their cocks? That makes a lot of sense.

12:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Try getting laid sometime..you both sound like two whining bitches.

11:59 PM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous-We just tell it like it is. I guess the truth bothers you. Thanks for stopping by and increasing the hit count.

3:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is Sam from Retrospect - I won't try to hide that. What I wanna know is exactly WHAT kind of metal you clueless idiots actually like? And why in the FUCK are you running a metal website if you are going to rag on bands like Metal Church , Leatherwolf , Saxon etc.. You are fucking corporate fags who cannot be positive about anything. If you don't like it DON'T BLOG ABOUT IT you fat pricks. No wonder you only get a few hundred hits on your site every month and I get over a million - because the majority of people LIKE 80s Metal. Seriously guys , you need to just stop acting like douchebags and get a fucking life. YOu are insignificant and do not support 80s metal so go fuck yourselves and stop pretending to be 'metal'. Nuff fucking said you washed up corporate ass-lickers. I DARE you to publish this.

2:53 PM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

Sam-Welcome back. We had this same conversation last year. I do like Metal Church, Leatherwolf and Saxon. However they are not perfect or above criticism. Corporate fags? What corporation would that be? We make no money from this. We do it because we like music and we like writing. We were positive about the bands who deserved it. You obviously did not read the whole post. I do like
80's metal that's why I listened to it growing up and that's why I started this blog four years ago. However not all bands are good. It's a fact of life. Get used to it. A few hundred hits? I think you know better than that. You called us insignificant last year. Work on some new material for next year.
I support metal every day by writing here and for the other sites I write for.
"Washed-up"? You are kidding right? With the stuff your label puts out? That's the pot calling the kettle black.
"Corporate ass-lickers" Oh, how cute. Just the opposite and we obviously didn't lick anybody's ass. We just tell it as it is.

This is my favorite line though.
"If you don't like it DON'T BLOG ABOUT IT you fat pricks."
That's right, all blogs are positive about everything. Oh, wait I guess they aren't. If they were all positive then people like you wouldn't have the chance to come over here and tell us how awful we are. We certainly appreciate you taking time away from your wonderful label to come over down here to the lower levels and set us straight.
Yeah, right. This year you are angry after Rocklahoma and you obviously found us by searching and hoping to find positive feedback about the festival. This year's event must have been even worse than I imagined.

I post all comments as long as they are not spam and don't contain links to illegal downloads.

4:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

See the thing is , Rocklahoma is the best multi-day festival in America. It continues to thrive because it's successful. So as much as you rag-tag douchebags hate to admit it - 80s Metal is still alive and well and certainly way above your tiny blog site. Your opinions don't matter guys - nobody cares. And as much as you try to rag on what I do and WANT to joke about the bands I represent , I'm still doing well 4 years into this thing because peeps are SICK AND TIRED of bullshit on the radio and want to be entertained by fun up-lifting , even cheesy , songs. Accept it , deal with it and move on fellas. I know you want it to die - but it's not gonna. So when we announce the killer line-up in 2010 try to be a little more positive about the outcome and thank the Gods of Metal that we aren't promoting complete shit like Tool , Disturbed , Theory of a Deadman , Nickelback , Slipknot etc. etc... Honestly guys , nobody gives a flying fuck how 'washed up' you think these bands are. Rocklahoma works because of the atmosphere and good times - maybe you fuckers need to experience it and stop the bitching.

3:27 AM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous- "Rocklahoma is the best multi-day festival in America" This is compared to what events like Rock gone wild that can't even get started? Wasn't the attendance at this years Rocklahoma like half of what it was two years ago? I think that what little novelty was there two years ago has faded fast.
I love your name calling that really helps your argument. Metal is still alive, but Rocklahoma is second or third rate. They have not gotten big names and continue to try to pump up the event with a lot of bands that would struggle to fill small clubs.
Obviously people do care about whether or not bands or washed up since not too people were flocking to see Stryper, Keel and the like this year.
There were bands on this year's line-up that I liked, but they were few and far between.
Really this event has become even more of a joke than I thought it would become when I started writing about the first festival two years ago. However I don't have to say much for it to look silly, the bands and the event organizers do that all on their own.
I don't want it to die, I just want to people to be realistic.
Thanks for stopping by.

3:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This post is a little too late but not for 2010. Look guys all musical tastes and opinions are relative. I don't see why everybody has to resort to name calling, if Metal Mark and his friends don't like Rocklahoma or hair metal fine. Thats their musical tastes and opinions. That being said I love hair metal, I was raised on it and yes a majority of the bands sucked, but thats like with every genre. However, in the above Rocklahoma review there was absolutely no call for the insults, stuff like people with no taste go to Rocklahoma. Come on guys. Your entitled to your opinion but that ain't cool. If people enjoy and have a good time going to Rocklahoma and enjoy the music who gives a fuck what anybody else thinks. Personally I like Metal Mark's insight, though most of the time I disagree with you man, I think you have good taste.

8:55 PM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous-It's our opinion and it's funny. If people want to go to this they are going to go, but I am still going to be honest about this being a collection of hasbeens. Just the way it is.

3:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your opinions are funny Metal Mark, even if I don't agree with them. I caught myself snickering at some parts of the above review. Again musical taste is all relative, there is no right or wrong. Thats just the way it is.

9:51 AM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous-Thanks for stopping by. We did write-ups for the first two Rocklahoma line-ups as well in similar fashion. I am a fan of some of these bands although more in the past. I think the first it sounds like it alright, but the last two years have seen more days and less talent. It would seem like it make more sense to do less days with bigger named bands if they feel the need to do this event. Maybe that is easier said than done though.

10:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To all of you ripping on eighties metal and rocklahoma, go FUCK YOURSELVES and take your FUCKING NINETIES CRAP and SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!!! And you DEATH METAL MORONS SUCK $%#^%#^!!!!

7:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey metal mark,

I would rather listen to these "has beens" as you so quaintly put it than ANYTHING put out on the radio past 1994! Metallica is a bunch of worthless corporate sell-outs whose music pretty much sucked after the "black" album("and justice for all" was not very good either).
Todays music is nothing but manic-depresive, Mono-octave, talentless, musicians who cannot even play a decent guitar solo!!

7:57 PM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous (the one who thinks it's cool to use language)-Go change your diaper because you are full of crap. No one is pushing 90's music and death metal has both good and bad bands. Some of the bands at Rocklahoma were once good, but now most of these bands are past their prime. No matter what festival they show up at these days it's still a festival for hasbeens.

anonymous the second-Who is talking about radio music? There is plenty of good hard rock and metal being put out by younger bands these days too, but no on the radio. Many of these bands that played at Rocklahoma had good albums in the 80's or early 90's. That's fine to enjoy those albums. However for a bunch of these bands to get to together at a festival now is a different story and that I would not want to see.

3:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just have to say, I stumbled across this website and I just can't believe the immature babies that comment back and complain like a little kid that was just told for the first time in his life that he can't have his favorite candybar today. I think its quite obvious Metal Mark likes metal, and just because some band that has been dead since the early 90's is playing a festival, does not make them gods. I never even heard of Rocklahomo so it must not be that great. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about bands coming back and making another album if they can do it good, and playing a performance if they can do it good. Metal Church don't belong at a rockfest anymore than Posion belongs at a metalfest.

Not every band will be great or put ona great comeback performance, so sorry guys, bad reviews do take place. If you don't believe then just put out your sure to be platinum album, just don't get it reviewed on THIS site and you should surely have nothing but priase and admiration for your top 10 of all time selling album and prove Metal Mark wrong. Maybe.........Rocklahomo should just step it up and get some better bands for the next fest, I think everyone would be in favor of that. Oh, and as far as Rocklahomo being the best music festival, why don't you stop being completely ignorant and go check out Maryland Deathfest, they have some great 80's "true" metal acts playing every year. And not too many of the bands in those lineups are wearing hairspray.

11:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Go check out Maryland Deathfest, they have some great 80's "true" metal acts playing every year. And not too many of the bands in those lineups are wearing hairspray."

Not much hairspray there it's true, but probably more make up than you'd see @ transvestite hookers convention.
Sorry when it's worn as "corpsepaint" it's "troo-kvlt" isn't it?
Dude, it looks gay.
Stop it.
On a serious note, any festival that pigeon-hole's itself as a sub-genre event is gonna struggle to attract decent headliners.
At Rocklahoma, it's has-beens & never-weres for the most part, all the bands that rode the coattails of the successful acts in that style.
I'm not saying they're bad, but the simple fact is most of these acts are not "draws" in their own right any more, and perhaps they never were.
Death-fest is different in that the more extreme bands had little commercial potential in the first place. And yes i know that wasn't ever their goal.
That means that it's probably just as over populated with 3rd division acts as Rocklahoma, but to the hardcore fan that probably gives their event more credibility, as none of those bands ever "sold out".
Either way, they're both a lot of fun for aging rockers of either stripe, an excuse to get loaded, recall the "good old days", before beer bellies, kids & mortgages, and wallow in nostalgia with some of their favourite music from back in the day.
And frankly, there's nothing wrong with that at all.
Horns aloft you glam-faggots and death metal sissies, i love you all.
Cedric The Ennertainer.

12:01 PM  
Blogger Metal Mark said...

anonymous (the most recent one)-Deathfest does a better job of bringing younger up and coming bands. It tends to be a mix of established bands and younger acts. Rocklahoma wasn't big on including up and coming hair bands. They chose to focus much more on hasbeens. Rocklahoma is much more about nostalgia than the Deathfest is. I don't think the two events are that close at all other than they are both festivals oh and Anvil have played at both events. Despite the name it's also not all death bands as there are usually black metal, doom, stoner rock and thrash acts playing there too. There you go.

5:44 AM  

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